Becoming Old: Part 1

Welcome to the initial installment of a regular segment I affectionately call:

Becoming Old: Reflections of a Twenty-Something Who's About to Lose her Title

(psss, to read a little about this segment click here)

Part 1: Is this real life? No, it’s college. 

OR 

The first time in my twenties I was sure I knew everything there is to know about being an adult.

Ahh the early twenties… otherwise known (to some) as the dawning of possibility. For me, this time was spent as a college student. The best part about college for me was the sense of purpose I felt about my current reality. I was working towards achieving a college degree and that was pretty awesome. What’s also awesome is the false sense of adulthood that accompanied this time in my life. By this time I had two years of college under my belt so I had craftily mastered the art of scheduling. I had classes 4 days a week, 5 days was for chumps, and never started before 9:30am. I also learned the key to impressing my classmates was to only look presentable 20% of the time. This way, the days I do my hair, got dressed, and wore makeup were not only memorable but also earned the the title of someone who “cleans up well,” thus making the remaining 80% of the time acceptable. Genius.

My social life in college was nothing short of amazing. I lived in a house with 64 of my closest friends and everyone I hung out with lived within a 1 mile radius of my front door. These people were the funniest, warmest, most exciting people I’m sure I’ll ever meet in my whole life and the craziest thing was, they all enjoyed my company. I never had a shortage of things to do, I always had at least one of my very best friends next to me at all times, and I loved every minute of it.

To recap... my daily college life consisted of 5 hours max of classes per day, an additional average of 1-2 hours of coursework per day, leaving an impressive 17-18 hours for various activities of my own choosing. I never worked out. No need, I had a really high metabolism (or so I kept telling myself), 11:00pm was often the start of my evenings, and I could eat or drink whatever I felt like. Life was good. In fact, I had no idea being an adult could be this good.

I was completely, 100%, undeniably convinced I had mastered the art of independence.

Then something funny happened and it’s called graduation. At first this phenomenon started taking some of my closest friends. No big deal I said to myself You've got lots of time before you graduate. Then graduation talk crept its way into my rigorous course work. I attended seminars titled, “How to Land Your First Job”, “The Real World: It’s Not So Scary”, and “How to Prepare to Live Off of Your Own Money Instead of Your Parents” (oh wait, that last one never happened but it should’ve). 

I began to realize my definition of being an adult and living in the “real world” may be flawed.

Graduation was like a black wall cloud approaching before a storm. I could see it coming, a part of me was kind of excited but mostly I was scared shitless. Even though I knew sunshine and blue clouds waited on the other side, it didn't take away the ominous unpredictability of the storm brewing within.

As you can read, I somehow weathered the storm. I like to think I did so with success and grace but what I've so clearly and eloquently articulated to you above is that sometimes my view of my own state of mind is faulty.

Sometime around my mid-twenties I read a Facebook status from a dear friend I grew up with and keep in touch with to this day. He was going through this stage in his life which is the first time I realized I may not be alone in thinking I had it all figured out when I was 20.

It read (this is not a direct quote): “Up early to enjoy coffee and the morning paper, off to class, then dinner on the deck in my new apartment. Being a full-fledged adult is not too shabby!” The key phrase here being: Being a full-fledged adult. A phrase I’ve come to realize may never be fully defined but I know is definitely not defined as a 20 year old living completely off their parents with: attend class as their only to-do item for the day. Never the less, it’s always nice to receive confirmation you’re not alone whether it be in the moment or years later.

So, to my 20 year old self I would like to say this: enjoy every moment of your life as you know it. It's not really how being an adult is but you don't need to know or think about that right now. Just enjoy everything to the fullest because it goes by as quick as it came. Hug your friends tighter, belt country music louder (because this is the only time in your life you'll be able to tolerate it), and sleep my sweet 20 year old self... sleep all you like. Oh, and the low pony with sweatpants look never gets old so enjoy being able to wear this as a "daytime look" for as long as humanly possible.